Life’s chapters

Our life's are changing all the time, we look at the change's through decades 20's, 30, and 40's

I like to call them life chapters . No matter what chapter we're in or been through good or bad we take with us lesson's to get us through this thing called life . As i've just had a birthday last month I thought I'd share some of the things i've learned so far .

Loving the person you are

I am half way through my 40's and can honestly say I'm loving them . I was dreading turning 40 it seemed so far away but like all big birthdays they come round so fast . Since turning 40 I started looking at life diffrently and rediscovered me as a person again not just as a wife and mother most importantly started liking me again,infact I feel like I did in my 20's mentally anyway not physically (but who does)

Unlike my 20's I'm more into looking after the inside of me than what my outside looks like, this doesn't mean I never use the creams that say they make you look younger I just don't expet them to change the way I look . I do look after my body but more how healthy and strrong it is than its appearance .

Now before I get a lot of hate mail I want to expain something .

I don't put on weight,Ive weighed the same pretty much since I was 20, maybe a little less as I didn't have boob's till I was 23 and they have to weigh something

I've spent most of my life with people commenting on my weight even strangers thinkng it's ok to come up to me to tell me how skinny I am,if I eat and the classic you need a good meal . I,ve come to terms with my weight and peoples perceptions of me I'm healthy have energy infact I very really have a cold this is who I am I've got to 45 and still haven't gained any weight you never know 50's may be my years of the midlife spread . What i've also learned is everyone has an opinion on what a person looks like big,small,fat or thin as long as your healthy and happy who cares . Excepting our insecurities is probably one of the biggest leasons we have to battle with and we have to stop worring about other peoples perceptions of us and loving ourselfs and loving yourself makes life so much easier to live .

FRIEND's

Friendships change as we do as people, some stay with you though your life others are just passing though . Each chapter of our life we choose our friend's for diffrent reasons and as we get older we become picky who we spend our time with .

You choose friend's in your chidhood by who is in your class at school or who lives nearest to your house .Your work friend's often become your friends because you spend most of your time with them and your work is the only thing you have incommon. Then you have your children's parents friend's the mums at the baby goup that you feel you have to get on with because your babies are 2 days apart and the school friend mum's that are your bestfriends till the kids fall out and its obviously your childs fault . Most of the friends we make though life are in the passing though category not many make the final cut, as time goes by we realise we have nothing in common with them apart from that time in our lives we met them .

40 was the age I decided which friend's I wanted in my life just like you declutter your wardrobe I declutted my circle of friend's .

I started with the one's I had nothing incommon with, who made me act like a different person when around them . Then the needy one's that take everything from you,your time and energy you feel physically drained after a coffee catch up with them and they never ask if you are ok . These are the one's who are so negative about life and everyone in it they make you only have negative thoughts and conversations with people for the next few days after seeing them . Oh! and not forgetting the one's who thrive on anything bad going on in your life and never share anything bad in theirs to make you think theirs is perfect ( fake life face book friends)

"Taking yourself off facebook"

is a life lesson in it's self and gets rid of most of the people listed above

Yes your circle of friend's does get smaller the older you get but your time becomes more precious to you so you want to spend it with people you genuinely like . I think I have my friend circle I,ve always wanted, the friend's i've kept I know I don't have to check in with every week or month they are just there when I need them as I am for them and enjoy being around .

LOVING THE LIFE YOUR LIVING

I said my 40's have made me feel more like I did in my 20's by that I ment the kid like feeling you have before adult responsibilities I still have all those adult responsibilties they just don't define who I am

I also don't mean I want to go out every weekend like I did in my 20's far from it I love a saturday night at home with my family in our pj's, in fact I don't like leaving the house after 7pm .

I used to look at peoples social media feeds and analize my life against theirs , why I'm I not out every weekend,how everyone always seems to be child free and why are they always on holiday . Once I took myself off social media that wasn't for work I started to realise I loved my life as it is . I love spending time with my family , it also make me realse I must have a really happy home life as I don't want to spend time with out my children or with other people to have a good time . I genuinely like the simple things in life .Yes I have a small house but its nearly paid for we have no debt or money worries not that we are well off in a financial way but comfort we are . We don't had a holiday longer than a few days not because we can't aford to we just choose to do things through the year and not just 2 weeks a year .

Our saturday nights are taken up by my husband cooking amazing family meals, yes we go out to eat too we just prefer to eat in were the whole family can get involved .

When people ask like they do ,any plans for the weekend or going away this year , you can see their faces when you say quite night in or may be a couple of days I used to walk away feeling my life must be missing something for not doing the things everyone else seems to do .

40's have tought me the things you do in life don't have to be big and grand the little things are the big things .

The over all lesson is live the life you love x